In the Jennifer's Embarrassment section Jennifer had a difficult time understand how Matt would tell his family all the problems that Jennifer and him are having in their relationship. Matt's mom Kelly has a very open relationship along with the rest of Matt's family, and Kelly feels that she always wants to know what is going on in their relationship so that she can help them and give them advice. Another situation Matt had a difficult time understanding why Jennifer if having a hard time, accepting the fact that his mom wants to have Jennifer call her mom as well.
Jennifer doesn't feel comfortable with that idea, and confides in Matt which takes a lot of courage for her to do, and she thinks that their conversation is between Matt and Jennifer. Later on when Matt and Jennifer go to a dinner at Matt's parents house, Matt discusses with his mother how Jennifer feels uncomfortable about calling Kelly her mother.
Jennifer is so embarrassed, after that he embarrasses her later as well, when he starts talking about children, and when they want to have children. Jennifer wants to wait, and Matt wants to have kids right away. Everyone in the family starts throwing in their two cents about what they think would be the correct way to handle the situation, and Jennifer runs out of the house mortified. In this situation Matt doesn't understand how Jennifer feels because he grew up in a different environment and they have a very open family, and Jennifer grew up in a very private family and her family never discussed anything.
So everything they discuss openly is very hard for her to understand. That is why Matt doesn't understand the problem with disclosing information with with his family, and why Jennifer doesn't understand why Matt does disclose information with his family.
I think that many couples forget that once they are married the relationship comes first and then family comes second. I think Matt needs to remember this and accept Jennifer's need for some privacy while Jennifer needs to trust and accept the family portion more.
ReplyDeleteIt's all too often in relationships that people forget that their a couple and try to please their family more than their partners. I think in a situation like this the man was being very selfish and disrespectful of his wifes feelings. I understand that he was raised differently, but I would think that every person could grasp the concept of privacy. I would react the same way the woman in the story did, but then again my husband would know better than to bring his family into our personal business = ) Great post. ~ Tonia Cravens
ReplyDeleteGood job summarizing the story up. If I was in this situation I would have been embarrassed as well. Even though Matt feels comfortable with his family Jennifer probably does not because it's not her own family.
ReplyDelete-Ashlee Luna
This was a really good case study! It's so interesting how the privacy factor is so different for the couple. It seems they didn't really find that out about each other until they were married. Makes me wonder how the level of privacy i have will impact a relationship I have with someone when I get married.
ReplyDeleteI found this case to be very interesting as relatable as well. The dynamics in relationships change with marriage, both between the couple and between the families of each person in the marriage. Mothers and fathers tend to interfere in their children's marriages because that privacy line is not clearly drawn. The key to a happy marriage and healthy interfamily relationship is to have established boundaries. Great post!
ReplyDelete~Jo Anna Phillips
This case was very interesting to read. I found it relatable to many relationships. To integrate the two families can at times be difficult. In a relationship there are certain rules that the couple should respect. By disclosing the fact that his wife doesn’t feel comfortable sharing intimate details about their relationship to his family should have been kept between the two of them. I loved reading your post. Great job.
ReplyDelete~Vanessa Burke~
I would be so hurt if this happened to me! Just because your partner is close with his family doesnt mean that he can tell all of your secrets. I think most relationships have had to deal with what information is kept secret and what is open to keep things going strong. Good Post!
ReplyDelete-Vanessa Ortiz